Actonians Cricket Club


SKLP v Actonians Cricket Club 4th XI on Sat 05 May 2018 at 1:00pm
Actonians Cricket Club Lost by 5 wickets

Match report 'The powerful exact what they can; the weak suffer what they must.'
- Thucydides, 'The Melian Dialogues'

The stage had been prepared; the cast had been chosen; the masks (or helmet grilles, depending on perspective) were waiting in their containers. It was the first weekend in May, and the Fours were ready for the league season to begin.

Unfortunately, Southgate were not. Having girded the loins of eleven West Londoners to face off against our good friends from the other end of the Piccadilly line, it emerged on Tuesday that Southgate could not field a side for the opening weekend of the season. The 10 points were ours, but we were not satisfied with this. Robbo went and negotiated with SKLP, and after arranging a friendly against a mixed squad from their threes and fours, we all trooped off to Swyncombe (aka Smithy's Stronghold/Roheet's Ranch/the Boston Manor Badlands) on an unseasonably hot Saturday lunchtime.

SKLP won the toss, but with a couple missing for them and 12 rocking up to play for the Axemen, they generously allowed us to bat first on a pitch that had more than a tinge of green about it. Dave Whear and newbie Rakesh opened up, and in tragically predictable style, Rakesh ran himself out for a seven-ball duck. The Chairman looked tidy for his 22 runs, but found his off stump on the wrong end of a bottom edge off their skipper, and so he (and the undershirt he inexplicably decided to wear in 27-degree heat) were back in the hutch soon afterwards. Roger could only poke around for seven balls before nicking off, leaving Aneeq 'Did You Hear I Scored A Century For Crouch End?' Malik and Shahid 'Silent Witness (To Aneeq's Baseless Bombast)' Akram at the crease. Aneeq top-edged to the keeper and Billy became our third quacker of the innings, but Shahid and Raman 'Nonagon' Sanghera quietly began to accumulate. The unfussy biffing of Shahid contrasted nicely with the bespectacled nurdling of the Westminster teenager, who is reportedly eyeing up a Lib Dem candidacy in Richmond for the 2022 General Election. Shahid was cruelly made aware of a phantom 50 by Roheet before getting out next ball to find that he'd made 49, leaving the new skipper to scrape his way back into form. Piri played a stunning lofted drive en route to a useful 18, but could not go the distance; I gave an obscene number of chances, and definitely should not have gone the distance. Richard came in in the dying balls of the innings, and we ended 183-8 off 45.

After a tea that really set the standard for the rest of the season, we trotted out to bowl, having jettisoned Billy so that the oppo could bat through to 11. Aneeq came charging in up the hill, and our hearts and minds were full of expectation. Unfortunately, the batsmen's eyes were full of clarity and timing, and they got off to a quality start. Piri did well to pin their numbers two and three and Smithanator kept it nice and tidy, but when they went into the drinks break well over 100, we knew something had to change. We started well, with Dave bowling some very tidy lines to get their no. 4 for 44 and their opening bowler giving me an extremely generous LBW decision, but we couldn't sustain our discipline, and they cruised over the line with plenty of time to spare. It was, however, good to get some overs in across the board, including for Richard and Roheet.

In the end, SKLP looked powerful with the bat, and we looked weak with the ball; they exacted what they wanted, and we suffered what we had to. That being said, there was much to be pleased with in this performance, and we head to Boddington this weekend full of expectation that we will inflict on Edmonton a defeat of truly Herculean proportions. Roll on Saturday.

Actonians Cricket Club 4th XI Batting
Player Name RunsMB4s6sSRCtStRo
4nb 7w 10b 2lb 
for 8 wickets

(4.5 overs)
David Whear b Dhiresh 22 37 4 59.46
Rakesh Prasher Run out  0 7 0
Roger Masterton ct Chetan 0 7 0 1
Shahid Akram ct Dylan 49 55 8 1 89.09
Aneeq Malik ct Joshi 4 7 1 57.14
Bilal Hussain ct Joshi 0 3 0
Raman Sanghera ct Dhiresh 20 33 2 1 60.61
Will Yates Not Out  45 65 4 69.23
Piradeepan Sivanathan b Dhiresh 18 24 4 75.00
Richard Thistlethwaite Not Out  2 12 16.67
Steve Smith   1

SKLP Bowling

Player nameOversMaidensRunsWicketsAverageEconomy

SKLP Batting
Player name RMB4s6sSR
1nb 5w 1lb 
for 5 wickets
187 (3.7 overs)
M. Halai lbw W. Yates 52
D. Hira ct P. Sivanathan 18
N. Gorsia b P. Sivanathan 5
N. Lalji lbw D. Whear 44
Bilal Hussain Not Out  19
D. Dapasia ct W Yates 15
C. Varsani Not Out  17

Actonians Cricket Club 4th XI Bowling

Player NameOversMaidensRunsWicketsAverageEconomy
Aneeq Malik3.002000.006.67
Piradeepan Sivanathan7.0127127.003.86
Steve Smith8.013100.003.87
Roheet Gupta3.001800.006.00
David Whear4.0016116.004.00
Will Yates6.0034217.005.67
Richard Thistlethwaite3.003300.0011.00
Raman Sanghera0.50500.006.00