Actonians Cricket Club


Winchmore Hill 4 v Actonians Cricket Club 4th XI on Sat 02 Jun 2018 at 12.30pm
Actonians Cricket Club Won by 4 wickets

Match report 'I thought you'd gone forever' - Mademoiselle de Poitiers, 'Picnic at Hanging Rock'

Early in June, a dreamlike heat-haze descended over West London. As the mercury climbed, Actonians players started to vanish without trace, leaving behind only vague excuses about 'stag dos' (Smithy), 'triathlons' (Jonesy) and 'lifeguarding' (Owen). The 1987 League waits for no man, however, so it was with a fairly inexperienced squad that we made the lengthy trip around the North Circular to Winchmore Hill.

Despite the hastily-assembled nature of the squad, winning the toss and fielding proved to be a huge bonus early on. Roheet, back in the side after a period of self-imposed exile, started brightly, forcing their numbers two and three to hole out. At the other end, Piri battled through injury to keep it tight, allowing Richard to capitalise and remove their number five for a duck. With Malik producing some quality bowling from the pavilion end to remove a couple more en route to a very tidy ten-over spell, all of a sudden we had them five down at drinks with only 60 or so on the board and only one of the top six making it out of single figures. It seemed that both sides had conspired to perform vanishing acts in their own unique ways.

Ironically enough, it was our turn to disappear after the drinks break. We removed their opener, but our catching was as watertight as Aneeq's argument for inclusion in the Ones and hairier than Bobby Uberoi's jawline. As the outfield dried up and the clouds burned off there was more and more reward for shots good and bad applied to balls straight and wide alike, and we couldn't take a catch for love nor money. With energy levels fading fast and only one wicket taken after the drinks break, we limped off the field (literally, in Rakesh's case) with 171 to chase off our 45.

Although neither Bobby nor Paul could make inroads against their canny opening bowler, the Fours found themselves once more in the ever-dependable hands of Roger Masterton. After starting slowly, the hapless change bowlers were lambs to the slaughter, and Roger was hungry for lamb chops. Khalid biffed his way to 28 before trying to deposit a full straight one into the neighbouring parish, but Piri stuck with Roger for a partnership of over 90. As the coffin-dodger closed in on fifty, Piri accelerated past his half-century and both Paul and Malik conveniently forgot how to count six balls to the over, it seemed as though victory was assured.

It would not, however, be a Fours game without a merry storm of batting-related brain-farts. Roger found himself stumped, the skipper ran himself out like a complete tit, and Piri also saw his bails whipped off by their elderly but agile keeper (Piri says that older men have whipped his bails off before, but normally it takes a bit longer and he has to help them out). Suddenly we were six down, with the combined brainpower of Rakesh 'Tweedledum' Prasher and Billy 'Tweedledumber' Hussain at the crease. Under strict instructions to nurdle their way to victory, Rakesh's common sense was the last thing to desert the Fours on that sunny Saturday. He took a massive heave across the line...and the ball disappeared to the boundary. We'd done it.

A worthy victory, but we didn't half make it look hard. Man of the match was unquestionably Piri: he played through serious pain and made an impact behind the stumps, at the crease and with ball in hand. The dick of the day arrived late because he was at the drive-through, shelled two chances, pulled his hamstring, and then slogged his way to victory because he 'couldn't run on a bad leg'. Rakesh Prasher, take a bow. We go home with 10 points, and we look forward to North Midd next weekend.

Winchmore Hill 4 Batting
Player name RunsMB4s6sSR
for 6 wickets
171 (4.5 overs)
J Porter b  Yates 52
H Bowen ct  Gupta 6
R O'Dwyer ct  Gupta 2
J Aventi ct  K Malik 5
T Cicchrillo ct  Thistlethwaite 0
B Forrester ct  K Malik 7
P Gunter Not Out  67
G Palmer Not Out  16
A Palmer  

Actonians Cricket Club 4th XI Bowling

Player NameOversMaidensRunsWicketsAverageEconomy
Piradeepan Sivanathan3.001000.003.33
Roheet Gupta10.0034217.003.40
Richard Thistlethwaite10.0129129.002.90
Khalid Malik10.0035217.503.50
Will Yates10.0039139.003.90
Saurabh Dhawan2.001400.007.00

Actonians Cricket Club 4th XI Batting
Player Name RMB4s6sSRCatchesStumpingsRun outs
for 6 wickets

(44.1 overs)
Bobby Uberoi Bowled  4
Paul Patel Lbw  0 1
Roger Masterton Stumped  44
Khalid Malik Caught  28 1
Piradeepan Sivanathan Stumped  59 2
Will Yates Run out  0
Bilal Hussain Not Out  5
Rakesh Prasher Not Out  9
Saurabh Dhawan  
Richard Thistlethwaite  
Roheet Gupta   1

Winchmore Hill 4 Bowling

Player nameOversMaidensRunsWicketsAverageEconomy
No records to display.